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Wednesday, May 26, 2021

another 14 year old survey

From a private blog on Dec. 12, 2007.

I started this one two nights ago, just finished it.
1. What is the status of you and the last person you held hands with?
He's in bed sawing logs, I boinged awake and got up at 2 a.m.  I think our current status is "not sleeping together".  HAHAHAHA!!!!!

2. What's bothering you right now?
I'm extremely content.  I just ate a piece of homemade dark rye toast loaded with butter and honey with a glass of milk, took a spoonful of benadryl to help me get sleepy again, and I'm loading pictures into photobucket until my eyelids get heavy.  The broadband is working great, in spite of all the towers icing up, and I still have electricity.  Life is good.

3. Who did you get this survey from?
Beats me.  I don't keep track of who posts surveys as bulletins on myspace.  I see a survey, I nab it.

4. When did you last cry?
How many tears is actual crying?  Are crying and weeping the same thing?  It's kind of like when someone says they threw up, and you imagine this violent awful experience of losing their lunch, when really it was only a little urp of slime.  Yeah, I know that's gross, but I find that when people use words like "cry" and "throw up", they tend to let the words carry the impact for something that I wouldn't consider a truly big deal.

5. Who do you hate?
I don't have the energy to hate.  Life is too short to hate.  I have better things to do than hate.  Hating is like focusing on something negative and destructive in a very selfish whiny kind of way, and unless you're hating someone who has truly ruined your life personally, as in murdering someone you love or destroying your marriage or doing dastardly things to your child, you're wasting precious time and energy you could be spending loving someone else.

6. What do you want in your life right now?
Sleepiness, come on down!!!  I would love to go back to bed for a few more hours.

7. Are you happy?
See previous survey for my feelings on 'happiness'.

8. How do you feel about the last person you kissed?
I love hugging him and feeling his fuzzy skin.

9. What do you smell like?
Fortunately I showered before I went to bed, so I can honestly say I smell good.   

10. Drinking?
I finished my milk a little while ago.

11. What's your favorite thing to have on your bed?

12. If you could change something in your life, what would it be?
I sure wouldn't mind not having allergies.
Where's 13?

14. Do you tend to make relationships complicated?
I do fine until my hormones go skydiving.  Anything after that technically isn't my fault.

15. How do you feel about the person you got this survey from?
I wonder about other people not catching the missing questions, and I wonder about people who answer everything in 3 words or less, but usually I wonder most about the person who created the survey in the first place-- are question numbers skipped on purpose?  Why?  Do other people just not care about details as much as I do?  I mean, the last survey was actually titled "70 questions", and 15 of them were missing.  Is someone out there deleting questions as they do surveys and passing them along, giggling insanely under their breath?  Or is the creator halfway through a fifth of vodka and feeling bitter and melancholy and dealing with life issues while they pose questions?  Yes, these and many more ponderances nag at me while I fill these out.
Where are 16 and 17?  (See what I mean?  Who in the world could not notice that we just jumped from 15 to 18?  Apparently MANY people.)

18. What did you do last weekend?
Some very exciting nap taking.  Actually, I don't remember, and I don't care.  I'm sure it's in my blog somewhere if someone is pervasive enough.

19. Who do you miss?
Sometimes I miss my sploit, but I'm so thrilled that we live in the age of cell phones and computers that I probably feel much better than if this were 200 years ago and I would probably get one letter a year from her IF the mail got through.

20. Who is the last girl and boy you hugged?
Twinkles and Scott.  I so rarely see anyone else, and I'm not into hugging my doctor and her staff.  I imagine I could hug the librarian when my interlibrary loan comes in, but that would be weird.

21. Are you scared of snakes?
Nope.  I've never understood that fear.  I grew up playing with snakes that we caught, and I once stepped on a copperhead barefooted (we both freaked out and ran...) and caught another barehanded in the house and killed it with a knife.  One time we even put a big black snake in a jar.  Never do that, by the way.  They have a really nasty smell to them when you keep them cooped up like that.

22. Who was the last person you went somewhere with? Where?
My weekly trip to town with Scott.    But I was puny and we cut it short.

23. What was the last text message you got?
I turn over private information only for cold, hard cash.

24. Have you kissed anyone on your top friends?
Do cheeks count?

25. Are you still with your first love?
My first love was a lump of blue turquoise rock.  I have no idea where it is.

26. Whose house did you go to last night?
Jaizzy's house!    I put straw in her nests and brought her some taco salad.

27. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
This is debatable, since the last time I spent 3 hours there I was hanging out with a bunch of strangers in the waiting room.

28. Who do you like right now?
Boy, this one stumped me.  We jump from hospital to who I like, and I just went completely blank.  Is 'like' supposed to mean 'feel infatuated with' in this instance?  Or just people I like in general?  Randomly speaking, I like the Sonic Guys.

29. Are you bored?
I'm rarely bored.  My brain never says "I'm bored".  It runs continually in all directions.

30. What is the last movie you watched?
Flyboys.  VERY cool.

31. Name three drinks you regularly drink?
Sadly, I laid off the hot chocolate this last week while I let my stomach rest.  I'm mostly sticking to hot tea and hot honey milk now.

32. What are you excited about?
Was I excited?  *looking around*  Sorry, didn't mean to be.  It was a mistake.  Sorry.

33. Do you want someone you can't have?
I question what it is I *truly* want.  I think if we explore feelings like that more deeply we find them rooted in a natural compulsion to escape a gaping loneliness that our souls have felt ever since we were born.

34. Who was last to slap your butt?
  I don't recall anyone slapping my butt for a very long time, and the next person who does is liable to get punched.

35. What makeup do you wear?
I like Maybelline and Almay, but I haven't had the free cash to explore in several years.  Makeup is so horribly expensive to dabble with.

36. What's on your mind right now?
Food... what do I want?  What sounds good?  All I had for lunch was a baked potato, and that was 5 hours ago.  Leftover taco?  Egg sandwich with cheese?  Cereal and toast?  I'm at a loss.

37. Who was the last person to make you cry?
No one *makes* me cry.  I cry because I'm having a bad day or something.  If I turn it into someone making me cry, then I'm giving power to someone else to hurt me instead of taking responsibility for it myself.  Much easier to come to grips with me being in charge of my own crying.

38. Name someone whose name starts with the letter "C"
My eyes are itching like mad ever since I change the straw in Jaizzy's house.  I think her old straw set my allergies off a little.

39. Do you care what others think about you?
My blog, my house, my life.  If you don't like it, why are you hanging around?  I think it's safe to say I could care less what others think of me, because in the end, all our judgments on others are based on our own insecurities.

40. What are you self-conscious about? Why?
I suppose in some ways I'm self conscious about simply existing.  My mom picked on me a little too much growing up, and I grew up feeling like I was never good enough in any way.  Frankly, I've come to realize that was her mental illness, and I'm pretty much fine now with who I am, but I *am* sort of super aware of how people treat each other now.

41. Do you trust people easily?
*everyone who knows me instantly cracks up*  NO!!!!!!!!!!    It takes me years to trust people.
Where's 42?

43. Do you think you'll be married by 10 months?
I think I'll stay married, yeah.  Thanx for asking.  Scott's the bomb.

44. What do you look forward to in the next 3 months?
I've been waiting on an interlibrary loan for over a month now.  The status every time I check is "awaiting arrival".  I think everyone along the delivery route is stopping to read this book.  One of these days *I'll* get to read it, too.  What is it, you ask.  It's Dress to Kill, Eddie Izzard's biography.
Where's 45?

46. Who was the last missed call?
I so rarely get calls, that was ages ago.

47. What's your ring tone?
I just leave it on vibrate.  I know there are some really neat ring tones out there, but I just can't stand having to obey a piece of machinery commanding me to do something.  I am NOT at beck and call, even though I keep my phone on me pretty much 24/7.

48. Do you plan on moving within the next year?
I might sit out on the deck more this spring.

49. What were you doing at 10pm Thursday night?
If you have anything on me, I'll still refuse to cooperate.

50. What happened at 10:00 am today?
Hang on a sec while I timewarp and find out.  *coming back with a hotdog*  I was getting ready to head out the door to a CT scheduled at 10:45.  Made me hungry for lunch.  I reminded myself to put paper plates on the shopping list, but I didn't see me do it, so I guess I'll have to do that later.  *rolling eyes*