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Sunday, September 21, 2014

another survey

Originally posted on 12-17-08.

1) How old do you look?
I look *GOR*geous!  Those of us who are just visiting appreciate our bodies so much more than Oprah does.



Dick says it perfectly at the end of that vid.  Oprah could use a good 3rd Rock marathon, sans full entourage, chef, hair dresser, cleaning staff, personal secretary, gardener, office building full of subjects, and chauffeur.  I have none of that, I’m the same size she is, and I’m apologizing to *nobody*.  Time to grow up and get over yourself, sweetie, and not via magazine cover announcement that will add to your billion dollar empire.


2) Do you know where the person is that has your heart?
At a magical place called “work”.  I sent a magical lunch of leftover spaghetti and homemade meatballs.

3) Are you waiting for something?
Rockin’ in 2009, yeah baby, yeah.

4) What were you doing at 10:30 last night?
Deciding that the little stick to my window blinds was swaying because of the heater running, and not a ghost.


5) Last myspace message you received?
Egads, I keep forgetting about myspace.

6) Can you handle the truth?
People can’t handle me being truthful.  Most people don’t want the real truth.  Most people want to find out they were Egyptian or famous or a sheepdog in their past lives, I’ve never heard of anyone thinking they might have been Plato.  Personally, I think I know the guy.  Like Einstein has said, All times are now.

And isn’t it a bad thing to be deceived about the truth, and a good thing to know what the truth is? For I assume that by knowing the truth you mean knowing things as they really are. (Plato)
The philosopher is in love with truth, that is, not with the changing world of sensation, which is the object of opinion, but with the unchanging reality which is the object of knowledge. (Plato)
Truthfulness. He will never willingly tolerate an untruth, but will hate it as much as he loves truth. … And is there anything more closely connected with wisdom than truth? (Plato)
What is at issue is the conversion of the mind from the twilight of error to the truth, that climb up into the real world which we shall call true philosophy. (Plato)
The object of knowledge is what exists and its function to know about reality. (Plato)

7) Did you cry today?
I question the humanity of people who don’t shed a tear of some kind on a daily or weekly basis.  Life on this earth sux.  If it’s not sucking for you, you’re not paying attention.

8) Do you hate the last person you had a conversation with?
* … *  Sorry, sorta lost it snickering there.  Why in the ~world~ would I have a conversation with someone I hate?

9) Is there anyone who understands your relationship status?
omg, we’ve got a fish in a barrel here.  Hang on, I’m gonna go load my gun.

10) Do you believe in God?
I think it’s amusing that people feel compelled to announce a *disbelief* in God.  If you have to go out of your way to make sure someone knows you don’t believe in God, it’s quite possible his existence is bugging the crap outa you, and that alone is making him a little too real for you to handle.  If you don’t want God to exist, stop saying his name and fighting against it.  I, for one, attempted atheism and failed miserably, because every time I flop on my face I find myself thinking of God and begging and making deals with the guy.  If you haven’t faced imminent horrible death, don’t worry, you’ll have your chance to test this.

11) Have you ever thought about converting your religion?
“Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.” James 1:27

Now that we’ve defined ‘religion’, I see no reason to change it.  Maybe the problem with people changing their religions is that they have no idea what it means in the first place.

12) What TV show could you watch over and over again?
Even I have my limits.  And I think we all know I can far outlast anyone I know in the over and over department.

13) What was the last thing you drank?Water.  I’m drinking all the water I can before it’s gone.  It already costs more than gasoline (in the U.S.).  I keep hearing rumors about water tables being depleted and potable water having to be redistributed to other metro areas, but I think the real problem is that Coke and Pepsi products are buying it all up to dump sugar and caffeine into.

14) Last person you hugged?
I just hugged a cookie with my mouth.

15) Who do you most look like in your family?
Probably Bean.  She’s one of my chickens.  She actually walks around looking at you and raising her chicken eyebrow like Mr. Spock.

16) Did you have a dream last night?
It had me.  They wait for me in the night.  I fear them.  I try to stay awake as long as I can, but they come after me, hunt me down.  They grapple me, taunt me, abuse me against my will.  And they never, ever turn out like I wish they would.

18) How many piercings do you have?
They wanted to pierce my liver last spring for some cells, and I wouldn’t let them.

20) Where does most of your family live?
Earth Prime, 3rd Rock from the Sun, Little Blue Planet.

21) Have you ever seen somebody get hit by a car?
Worse.  Ask me if I’ve ever held a person while she bled to death after a car accident, and I’ll get back to you.

22) Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?
I accidentally poked it inside with something sharp.  For a good time in total sensation and loss of self control, play around with one of those long wooden skewers and accidentally jam it up your nose.  I’m sure a toothpick would work nicely if you don’t happen to have one of those around.  Talk about a rush.

23) Have you broken a bone?
My creativity knows no bounds.  They called it a double spiral twist and were amazed I walked on it for two weeks without further harm.

24) Have you ever had a panic attack?
It lasted about 4 1/2 years.

25) Can you sleep in jeans?
Imagine my surprise when I woke up without them.  I tend to get hot and strip in my sleep.  Actually, I don’t own a pair of jeans.

26) What can’t you wait for?
Relief.

27) When is the last time you told someone you loved them and meant it?
I’m not in the habit of telling people I love them when I don’t mean it.

28) Name one of your favorite female celebrities?
Rula Lenska really caught my attention when I was a child for some reason.

30) Do you live near your most recent ex boyfriend / girlfriend?
One of us would be dead by now if I did.

31) Are you good at giving directions?
Yes, and other people suck at following them.

32) What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic?
Years ago when I worked at Sonic I got really into double cherry pepsi.  I haven’t drank pepsi since I stopped working there.

33) When was the last time you cried really, really hard?
I can no longer cry really, really hard, it’s physically impossible, and I didn’t write down the last time I did.  Sorry.  You are wondering how it can be physically impossible to cry.  Between Bell’s Palsy nerve damage (I lack enough tear production to keep it up) and activity induced asthma (I can’t laugh hard any more, either) and severe fibromyalgia of the chest wall (total muscle seizure of the entire rib cage to the point where I can’t draw in a breath), I seriously cannot cry more than a few seconds.  Weird, huh?

34) What did you have for lunch today?
Not quite there yet, but I don’t think you really care.

35) When was the last time you licked someone’s cheek?
About time to start shooting at that fish…

36) What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?
I stopped eating peanut butter when my nephew came up allergic to it.  But it used to be honey.

37) Where were you on July 4th, 2008?
Egads, *here*!  What are the odds???

38) What body part(s) do you wash first in the shower?
*BLAM!*  Dang, nicked a fin off.  Swim in circles, fishie!!!!!  HAHAHAHA!!!!!

39) Have you ever kissed anyone who’s name started with a B?
Ok, this is getting pretty stupid.  Our survey maker is dying to tell us who he/she has kissed whose first name starts with B.

40) Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
Right in the middle weather, like early spring and late fall.  I’ve noticed I’m a transition person.  I like dawn and dusk, too.  I constantly long for what I can’t have but for only a short time.

41) What do you currently hear right now?
Weather Channel, people slicking up and down my street in their cars.

42) Does someone like you right now?
Too many people like me.  I’m trying to change that.

43) Could you go out in public looking like you do now?
It doesn’t bother me to scare the straights.

44) What are your nicknames?
Is this about over yet?  I really need to go do something productive.

45) On the opposite sex do you like them to have piercings?
One of these days Scott’s going to walk in with a limb missing and freak me out.

46) Who is super funny?
Dooney certainly gives us the most to talk about.  Nut.

47) Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something?
My mom was a freakazoid anyway, so I don’t take the blame for that one.

48) favorite food?
I seem to be eating a lot of homemade and Progresso soup lately.  Probably the weather, but boy, it’s sure good.

49) What is your favorite color?
Need anyone ask… (this one)

50) If you could go back in time, how far back would you go?
All the way.  All the dang way.

51) What/who last made you mad?
I could dwell on that, or I could move on.  *BLAM!*  Ha, gotcha!  Watch that fish float!

52) Last persons bed you were in other then your own?
Sorry, fish, I’m off to see the Wizard.